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WILKES-BARRE — Nimalet Proctor went behind Andre Johnson’s back Tuesday night and wrote some things about him in permanent marker.
She did the same thing to other fifth- and sixth-graders at Dodson Elementary School, and so did Andre. And their schoolmates returned the favor. They wrote compliments on index cards taped to their schoolmates’ backs.
The flattery ranged from phrases such as “I like your shirt” to “You’re a kind and pretty girl” to “Bro, awesome glasses.”
It was one of several exercises in which the students participated during the Strengthening Families Program.
Another activity included breaking into two groups — one focused on naming things that are fun and not fun about being youths, and another focused on naming things that are fun and not fun about being parents — and then discussing them.
Down the hall, the children’s parents were participating in projects and discussions of their own.
The interactive, seven-week program consists of a skill-building curriculum designed to strengthen family bonds, promote positive communication and enhance the ability to solve problems together, according to program literature.
“There are unbelievable results for youth who do this program,” said Melissa Tomascik, a youth and family prevention specialist from the Penn State Extension and a program director. “They have less likelihood to initiate substance use … they stay in school, they stay out of other problem behaviors like vandalism. Teen pregnancy is down. There are just a multitude of great outcomes that come with this program.”
And the positives are not only seen in the long-term
“There are a lot of great things that happen right now — kids identifying and coping with stress in healthy ways, learning what qualities make a good friend, because that’s so important — who you surround yourself with, especially when you’re going through that transition” into the teen years when children begin to “pull away from their parents,” Tomascik said.
She added that many of the parents in the program “talk about how to cope with their children going through these changes, to see things from their point of view, discipline — all those things that really keep kids academically involved and keep them out of trouble, which is awesome.”
The program, which began last year at Dodson and has a budget of about $4,500, is a partnership with the United Way of Wyoming Valley, the Penn State Extension and the Wilkes-Barre Area School District, with the United Way funding the program.
Jennifer Deemer, vice president of Community Impact with the United Way, said the program is an excellent fit with the agency’s mission and focus of addressing childhood poverty.
“Many families that send children to this school are struggling economically and, where there are struggles in that way, there’s stress in that family. Keeping families engaged with their children, especially as they’re getting older and they’re exposed to more opportunities for risky behavior, is really key to making sure that that family stays together and they’re communicating with one another in appropriate ways,” Deemer said.
“Strengthening families strengthens communities,” said United Way CEO Bill Jones, noting that Dodson is one of the 500 lowest-income school buildings in the nation.
“If we could help families understand the value of education, those kids will do better and grow up being better in school and hopefully, as they do better and have higher goals for themselves, maybe we can disrupt a whole cycle of poverty over time,” Jones said.
Jim Geiger, who began his first year as principal at Dodson this fall, is pleased to see parents willing to bring their families to the school, and he enjoys meeting and spending some time with them at the meals served before each weekly program session.
Geiger is hopeful that the program “helps the students to communicate better with their parents, helps them learn how to handle stress and gets them ready to be teenagers … so when it’s time for them to make tough decisions, they’ll have the skills that they need.”
A mother of eight, Sarah Parker, of Wilkes-Barre, said she wanted to participate because she thought it could strengthen her family and provide “an opportunity for us to come together and get a better idea of what it is that the kids like and don’t like.”
Randa Faraj, who has a son in sixth grade at Dodson, said this is the second year her family is participating in the program.
“We were a strong family, but it’s made us more close in some ways,” she said.
Faraj likes that her son is thinking about “his career goals, talking about life goals.”
She said one of the things she has taken away from the program is understanding the importance of having patience with her son and taking the time “to hear his side because sometimes, as parents, we don’t give kids a voice, so they don’t express themselves, and that’s a big problem.”
“There are a lot of kids doing things they’re not supposed to because no one takes the time to listen to them, to hear their voice,” Faraj said. “And every voice matters.”
